I just wrote for about 20 mins, re-read what I wrote, scrapped it, and now here I am. Creative juices are just not flowing right now. I am back home after a nice weekend out at the beach. I swam in the ocean, relaxed, saw Alec Baldwin, tried to catch a blue fish bare-handed, ate well, hung out with family, and wore peach-colored pants. All said, it was a great weekend. I have a lot to say about b-school, and its social, political, and economic implications on my life. The Cliff's Notes to that blog will go something like this "good, whatever, uh-oh".
Before I get all serious I want to let you know that multiple people have said, "Finger, you are going to meet your wife at school". Friends, Mom,...I don't need this extra pressure, but I'm not going to lie, hopefully future Mrs. Finger is out there somewhere in the mid-west, sharpening her no. 2 pencils, preparing her trapper-keeper, and sitting at her computer blogging about the WASP-y Jew with a slowly receding hairline and a nice jumpshot she hopes to meet in Ann Arbor. It's not totally out of the question. But in the next two years it is going to be interesting to see how I can keep up and keep in touch with my friends. Some of them are getting married or are close to it and it's great that they are ready to spend the rest of their lives with someone forever and ever, with the same one person, for eternity. Forever, (cough), ever. Youcan'tchangethemeventhoughyouthinkyoucan (ahem). But anyway, I feel like by the time I'm done with school a bunch of my friends will be married. NYC is a funny place. I recently went to a baseball game with some guys and one guy was saying that he has been living with his girlfriend for 2 years (but had been dating her for 3 years) and now that their lease is up they are deciding where their relationship is going to go. If they continue to live together then engagement is probably in the cards at a point sometime soon, but if they don't live together, well...put a fork in it, it's kind of done. You know that guy you write your rent checks to every month, that fat bald guy who you drop off your checks with every month, you are telling me that this guy is going to force you into long-term life decisions? This I cannot understand. Sometimes I feel like every girl in NYC has an agreement with some secret underground leasing agent cooperative that says something like this:
"After 2 years raise my rent and the rent for my boyfriend's apartment just enough so that on pure economics alone it makes sense to move in together. If both you and I apply enough pressure then I can make the argument that we'll be saving money by moving in together and then I can somehow convince him to put a large portion of those savings towards my engagement ring which I've had picked out since our third date"
This is the reason 90% of you reading this blog even exist...rent increases made your parents move in together and 9 months later...you. Forget Elliot Spitzer, forget Barry Bonds, forget dog food contamination, this is a REAL scandal. When they uncover the office of this underground cooperative somewhere in Great Neck don't be surprised. You heard it hear first.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Chiiiinese Chicken Salad and Other Summertime Favorites
For business school they recommend you get your resume in order before you get on campus, and this makes perfect sense. From everything I've heard from faculty, students, and alumni, you really hit the ground running. Based upon this past weekend I think I can add the following items to my resume under "Skills"
1. Air Drying
2. Watching the Discovery Channel
3. Not wearing underwear
And while you think these may all be tied into one crazy incident, they are not.
First, I've always been excellent at air drying. Plus, air drying is environmentally friendly. So while you are filling up your SUV at $3.49 a gallon this summer, I am not using towels, not running excessive washes, and therefore minimizing my "energy footprint". What you know about that Al Gore? You must have left that little "inconvenient truth" out of your last movie.
Next, watching the Discovery Channel. And when I say Discovery Channel I really am referring to Man vs. Wild which is my second favorite show on TV, after HBO's The Wire. Anything I write will hardly do this show justice. A friend recently proclaimed that Man vs. Wild (new eps on Friday at 9p) was the highlight of his Friday, to which I concurred. I don't know if this says more about the sad state of our social calendars as it does about the sheer awesomeness of watching Bear Grylls single-handedly take nature to school. I urge you all to watch it. You can even make a drinking game out of it before you go out on Friday night. Every time Bear says "lashings", or "nature's superfood" take one sip. Every time Bear eats an animal/fish/bug raw drink a beer. If you want to learn how to catch a rabbit with a shoelace and a stick this show is for you. If you're not sure just check out www.beargrylls.com.
And lastly, I wore a bathing suit virtually the entire weekend. When I finally needed to wear jeans, my careless P.A. ("personal assistant" for the hoi polloi) didn't pack the correct underwear, so I went commando for like, six hours. Come on, like you've never done that before?
Anyway, I'm back in NYC for a few days this week and looking forward to catching up with some friends. If you are looking for me I'll be with stick and shoelace in Central Park trying to catch dinner.
1. Air Drying
2. Watching the Discovery Channel
3. Not wearing underwear
And while you think these may all be tied into one crazy incident, they are not.
First, I've always been excellent at air drying. Plus, air drying is environmentally friendly. So while you are filling up your SUV at $3.49 a gallon this summer, I am not using towels, not running excessive washes, and therefore minimizing my "energy footprint". What you know about that Al Gore? You must have left that little "inconvenient truth" out of your last movie.
Next, watching the Discovery Channel. And when I say Discovery Channel I really am referring to Man vs. Wild which is my second favorite show on TV, after HBO's The Wire. Anything I write will hardly do this show justice. A friend recently proclaimed that Man vs. Wild (new eps on Friday at 9p) was the highlight of his Friday, to which I concurred. I don't know if this says more about the sad state of our social calendars as it does about the sheer awesomeness of watching Bear Grylls single-handedly take nature to school. I urge you all to watch it. You can even make a drinking game out of it before you go out on Friday night. Every time Bear says "lashings", or "nature's superfood" take one sip. Every time Bear eats an animal/fish/bug raw drink a beer. If you want to learn how to catch a rabbit with a shoelace and a stick this show is for you. If you're not sure just check out www.beargrylls.com.
And lastly, I wore a bathing suit virtually the entire weekend. When I finally needed to wear jeans, my careless P.A. ("personal assistant" for the hoi polloi) didn't pack the correct underwear, so I went commando for like, six hours. Come on, like you've never done that before?
Anyway, I'm back in NYC for a few days this week and looking forward to catching up with some friends. If you are looking for me I'll be with stick and shoelace in Central Park trying to catch dinner.
Thursday, July 19, 2007
1. Cut a hole in the Box...
No more boxes, please. I'm not even done unpacking and by the time I'm done unpacking I'll be ready to pack for Michigan.
Really quickly, that pipe explosion in NYC yesterday was a block away from my old office, and along the route I walked to and from the subway every day. Kind of crazy.
Since we had no internet connection in the house until this morning I actually went to the Greenwich Public Library to check my email. The whole going-on-the-internet-at-a-public-library-thing kind of sketches me out a little bit and that's mostly due to that whole Carl Monday fiasco that went down last year in Ohio. If you don't know who Mr. Monday is, just Wikipedia him. Anyway, I just assume that everyone in there is some sort of deviant which I know is wrong. If you just sit back and observe people at their computers you'll see what some folks call "prairie dogging". This is basically when someone is hunched over at their computer and then they'll lift up their head and peek over their cube, look around, then hunch back down and resume what they were doing. If you look at everyone from above they resemble a pack of prairie dogs peeking out of their burrows. I don't care if you're typing a recipe for raspberry pie, if you're prairie dogging every five minutes it looks like you're trying to hide something, and when I say "something" I mean porn. Carl Monday has stolen my innocence.
Today I ventured out to Greenwich Avenue to do some shopping. For a couple of days each summer stores participate in "Sidewalk Sales" which is when stores move inventory to the sidewalk and sell it at a "discounted" price. Very simple concept. These sidewalk sales bring out a lot of people, and at least today these people seemed to be primarily women, approximately 30-45 years old, obnoxious, loud, blue-toothed, and trailed by their two ice-cream stained kids and Laotian/Vietnamese/Burmese nanny. I'm fine with these types of women, but I'm not a fan of the ones who walk around like it's their world and everyone else is just a visitor. Excuse me ma'am, take your red Tory Burch ballet flats, click your heels twice, and get the fuck out of the middle of the road, you're blocking traffic. These women are so oblivious that sometimes you just have to laugh. Like today, some lady parked her Bugaboo stroller at the bottom of the staircase in J. Crew. In the real world you just can't do that, but on planet The-Rules-Don't-Apply-to-Me apparently you can. I don't know about everyone else, but I was waiting for a re-enactment of the famous shoot-out scene from The Untouchables. I'm just hoping I don't end up with a woman like this. I hear that they cast very powerful spells and have sharp claws, so please say a prayer for me.
Really quickly, that pipe explosion in NYC yesterday was a block away from my old office, and along the route I walked to and from the subway every day. Kind of crazy.
Since we had no internet connection in the house until this morning I actually went to the Greenwich Public Library to check my email. The whole going-on-the-internet-at-a-public-library-thing kind of sketches me out a little bit and that's mostly due to that whole Carl Monday fiasco that went down last year in Ohio. If you don't know who Mr. Monday is, just Wikipedia him. Anyway, I just assume that everyone in there is some sort of deviant which I know is wrong. If you just sit back and observe people at their computers you'll see what some folks call "prairie dogging". This is basically when someone is hunched over at their computer and then they'll lift up their head and peek over their cube, look around, then hunch back down and resume what they were doing. If you look at everyone from above they resemble a pack of prairie dogs peeking out of their burrows. I don't care if you're typing a recipe for raspberry pie, if you're prairie dogging every five minutes it looks like you're trying to hide something, and when I say "something" I mean porn. Carl Monday has stolen my innocence.
Today I ventured out to Greenwich Avenue to do some shopping. For a couple of days each summer stores participate in "Sidewalk Sales" which is when stores move inventory to the sidewalk and sell it at a "discounted" price. Very simple concept. These sidewalk sales bring out a lot of people, and at least today these people seemed to be primarily women, approximately 30-45 years old, obnoxious, loud, blue-toothed, and trailed by their two ice-cream stained kids and Laotian/Vietnamese/Burmese nanny. I'm fine with these types of women, but I'm not a fan of the ones who walk around like it's their world and everyone else is just a visitor. Excuse me ma'am, take your red Tory Burch ballet flats, click your heels twice, and get the fuck out of the middle of the road, you're blocking traffic. These women are so oblivious that sometimes you just have to laugh. Like today, some lady parked her Bugaboo stroller at the bottom of the staircase in J. Crew. In the real world you just can't do that, but on planet The-Rules-Don't-Apply-to-Me apparently you can. I don't know about everyone else, but I was waiting for a re-enactment of the famous shoot-out scene from The Untouchables. I'm just hoping I don't end up with a woman like this. I hear that they cast very powerful spells and have sharp claws, so please say a prayer for me.
Monday, July 16, 2007
24 Years is a Long Time
The fam is moving out of our house after 24 years and that's what has been taking up the majority of my time this past week. It's pretty ridiculous how much stuff you accumulate over 24 years. I have an issue parting with things. I came across a crate of "retired t-shirts" which basically meant that I wore them to death. Instead of chucking them I "retire" them, but at 25 years old I'm finally mature enough to throw the shirts out (except for two of them).
I'm kind of nostalgic, but far less than I thought I'd be. With moving to a new house (which is only 7 minutes away from the current one), moving out of NYC, and then up to Ann Arbor all in the next month I'm feeling kind of nomadic. By the way, the movers are machines. Instead of carrying a heavy box in front of them, the stack three heavy boxes behind their back and then lean forward which takes the majority of the weight off of their arms. They are skilled for sure and that's why they are employed and I am not.
One man's trash is another man's treasure and that theme has shown up a number of times during the course of the move. For example, I'm currently wearing a tennis shirt that was cool circa 1988 and it probably made a comeback some time in the mid-90s again, but now is definitely just out of style. Well, my Dad was going to throw this shirt away, but I saved it and now will be waiting for when this shirt comes back into style in 2010. I'm patient, I can wait it out. There's been a lot of that going on this week and it's kind of amusing. And because packing just isn't funny at all, you have to keep the mood light. So if my sister has a box that says "Caroline's room: Skirts and Tops" I'll go over with my pen and add "and thongs", and then I giggle to myself and then I wait. And then she'll take one of my boxes that says "John's Room: Sneakers and shirts" and add "and year supply of Valtrex", and then we get progressively more inappropriate until we feel like we've crossed the line, and then the game is over. And yes we are 25 and 22.
So that's really it for now. The new house has a pool and I'd love to have all six of you out for a swim some time, but since I'm moving to Ann Arbor the second week in August I just don't think that's going to happen this summer. Maybe in 2008, but by then this site will surely have been picked up by Gawker and I will have cashed out and will be hanging out in Monaco or Capri or Ann Arbor or something.
And because I know you constantly refresh this site hoping I've done a new entry, unfortunately this computer needs to get packed up too and who knows when it's coming back out of the box, so it may be a little bit between now and my next entry.
I'm kind of nostalgic, but far less than I thought I'd be. With moving to a new house (which is only 7 minutes away from the current one), moving out of NYC, and then up to Ann Arbor all in the next month I'm feeling kind of nomadic. By the way, the movers are machines. Instead of carrying a heavy box in front of them, the stack three heavy boxes behind their back and then lean forward which takes the majority of the weight off of their arms. They are skilled for sure and that's why they are employed and I am not.
One man's trash is another man's treasure and that theme has shown up a number of times during the course of the move. For example, I'm currently wearing a tennis shirt that was cool circa 1988 and it probably made a comeback some time in the mid-90s again, but now is definitely just out of style. Well, my Dad was going to throw this shirt away, but I saved it and now will be waiting for when this shirt comes back into style in 2010. I'm patient, I can wait it out. There's been a lot of that going on this week and it's kind of amusing. And because packing just isn't funny at all, you have to keep the mood light. So if my sister has a box that says "Caroline's room: Skirts and Tops" I'll go over with my pen and add "and thongs", and then I giggle to myself and then I wait. And then she'll take one of my boxes that says "John's Room: Sneakers and shirts" and add "and year supply of Valtrex", and then we get progressively more inappropriate until we feel like we've crossed the line, and then the game is over. And yes we are 25 and 22.
So that's really it for now. The new house has a pool and I'd love to have all six of you out for a swim some time, but since I'm moving to Ann Arbor the second week in August I just don't think that's going to happen this summer. Maybe in 2008, but by then this site will surely have been picked up by Gawker and I will have cashed out and will be hanging out in Monaco or Capri or Ann Arbor or something.
And because I know you constantly refresh this site hoping I've done a new entry, unfortunately this computer needs to get packed up too and who knows when it's coming back out of the box, so it may be a little bit between now and my next entry.
Monday, July 9, 2007
Summertime is great becauzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Jetlag hits you like a sockfull of nickels. 10pm rolls around and I can barely keep my eyes open. I'm not complaining, just stating. Despite not being at the beach I continue to wear a bathing suit around the house all day in hopes that a plane lands on the lawn and takes me away to some island. The closest I got to sand all day today was chewing on the still gritty parsley in the tabouli my sister made for dinner.
Anyway, around this time of year a lot of companies have their annual Summer Party, which is often just an excuse to talk about work while wearing shorts instead of pants. I have no office summer party this year since I am unemployed, but I wanted to write about some of the things I like most about summer parties.
1. Oooh...a dolphin jumping through a rainbow....nice....
Tatoos my friends, tatoos. Quiet girl with glasses who sits in the corner bends over to grab a cold one out of the cooler...is that, no it can't be...actually yes, it's Kermit the Frog's face three inches above her ass crack. I wonder if mom knows about that one. It is always great to see who has tatoos. It's usually the ones you expect and the ones you absolutely least expect. See that woman who works in Operations...that Chinese symbol on her hip, it means "Bad Mistake when I was a first semester freshman that I'll have to explain for the rest of my life". Interestingly enough, on my trip to Israel, I'd say about 40% of the girls on my trip had a tatoo. I didn't realize tatoos were that popular, but then again, I cry when I get my flu shot.
2. Open Bar doesn't mean "Woooo Spring Break 2003!!!!"
I always love to see the person who clearly never drinks and then decides to make up for lost time at the summer party. I don't care if it is open bar or not, you're with people from work. Drinking for noon until sunset on a 100 degree day and passing out poolside should only be done in the company of close friends or absolute strangers. You officemates WILL take pictures of you while you are passed out, and if they're anything like me, they'll print those pictures out and put them up on the fridge in the office kitchen the next day. Smile and say "you're not living this one down". If these folks don't pass out then they are usually good for a really awesome conversation with their boss that goes something like this...
Drunk Person: Hey you know what?
Boss: What?
DP: When you interviewed me I wasn't scared of you, you know that right?
Boss: Um, okay.
DP: Yeah, I'm not scared of shit, okay? I just want to make sure you know that.
Boss: Well that's good, I'm glad you told me.
DP: Good, I'm going to make my own ice cream sundae now, so that's where I'll be.
Each summer party I pray someone gets belligerent and usually someone steps up by the time dinner rolls around.
3. Who Wears Short Shorts?
Cocktail Hour, a time to clean up from those long, boring softball games, shower, change into a fresh shirt, have a scotch, and continue conversations from earlier in the day. Cocktail Hour, not a time to get out of the pool, rest your breasts on the bar and ask the bartender for 2 Long Island Iced Teas, one for you and one for you when you finish your first one. If you are eating lobster in the same room as your CEO I'm pretty sure you shouldn't be wearing a bathing suit. Actually, that might even be in the Office Guideline thing you sign when you join the company. I'm no manners expert here, but I'm just talking common sense, and without fail, every year there is someone who just doesn't get the memo, which is fine by me, because I find it amusing.
4. Hitting the Tri-Fecta
If by chance (fingers crossed) one person fulfills items 1, 2, and 3 do not hook up with them at the party because people don't forget that. Hooking up with "that girl/guy" is almost worse than being "that girl/guy". Clearly you are supposed to wait for them to get fired and then you can start dating them.
So, I hope all you working lads and lasses enjoy your summer parties because I know I'll be missing mine.
Anyway, around this time of year a lot of companies have their annual Summer Party, which is often just an excuse to talk about work while wearing shorts instead of pants. I have no office summer party this year since I am unemployed, but I wanted to write about some of the things I like most about summer parties.
1. Oooh...a dolphin jumping through a rainbow....nice....
Tatoos my friends, tatoos. Quiet girl with glasses who sits in the corner bends over to grab a cold one out of the cooler...is that, no it can't be...actually yes, it's Kermit the Frog's face three inches above her ass crack. I wonder if mom knows about that one. It is always great to see who has tatoos. It's usually the ones you expect and the ones you absolutely least expect. See that woman who works in Operations...that Chinese symbol on her hip, it means "Bad Mistake when I was a first semester freshman that I'll have to explain for the rest of my life". Interestingly enough, on my trip to Israel, I'd say about 40% of the girls on my trip had a tatoo. I didn't realize tatoos were that popular, but then again, I cry when I get my flu shot.
2. Open Bar doesn't mean "Woooo Spring Break 2003!!!!"
I always love to see the person who clearly never drinks and then decides to make up for lost time at the summer party. I don't care if it is open bar or not, you're with people from work. Drinking for noon until sunset on a 100 degree day and passing out poolside should only be done in the company of close friends or absolute strangers. You officemates WILL take pictures of you while you are passed out, and if they're anything like me, they'll print those pictures out and put them up on the fridge in the office kitchen the next day. Smile and say "you're not living this one down". If these folks don't pass out then they are usually good for a really awesome conversation with their boss that goes something like this...
Drunk Person: Hey you know what?
Boss: What?
DP: When you interviewed me I wasn't scared of you, you know that right?
Boss: Um, okay.
DP: Yeah, I'm not scared of shit, okay? I just want to make sure you know that.
Boss: Well that's good, I'm glad you told me.
DP: Good, I'm going to make my own ice cream sundae now, so that's where I'll be.
Each summer party I pray someone gets belligerent and usually someone steps up by the time dinner rolls around.
3. Who Wears Short Shorts?
Cocktail Hour, a time to clean up from those long, boring softball games, shower, change into a fresh shirt, have a scotch, and continue conversations from earlier in the day. Cocktail Hour, not a time to get out of the pool, rest your breasts on the bar and ask the bartender for 2 Long Island Iced Teas, one for you and one for you when you finish your first one. If you are eating lobster in the same room as your CEO I'm pretty sure you shouldn't be wearing a bathing suit. Actually, that might even be in the Office Guideline thing you sign when you join the company. I'm no manners expert here, but I'm just talking common sense, and without fail, every year there is someone who just doesn't get the memo, which is fine by me, because I find it amusing.
4. Hitting the Tri-Fecta
If by chance (fingers crossed) one person fulfills items 1, 2, and 3 do not hook up with them at the party because people don't forget that. Hooking up with "that girl/guy" is almost worse than being "that girl/guy". Clearly you are supposed to wait for them to get fired and then you can start dating them.
So, I hope all you working lads and lasses enjoy your summer parties because I know I'll be missing mine.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Apple Pie
I'm back, finally. I've been up for about 36 hours straight, including a 12 hour layover in Tel Aviv. That layover was truly a test of endurance. You can only read a book for so long, and you can only listen to your iPod for so long. At one point we were timing how long it took to count roof tiles. Once we arrived at JFK at 5:30am it was straight to the LIRR and out to the beach for a little friends and family and 4th of July BBQ in the rain.
My vision is blurry and I'm ready for hibernation, but once I'm rested I'll share some thoughts about the trip.
I just read this post and it is pretty weak, so apologies for that. Next one will definitely be better.
My vision is blurry and I'm ready for hibernation, but once I'm rested I'll share some thoughts about the trip.
I just read this post and it is pretty weak, so apologies for that. Next one will definitely be better.
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Low on Euros
My sister and I have been playing a game to pass the time and it's called "hey is that Jose Canseco?" Basically we just point out guys that look like Jose Canseco and so far we've see him at the bus stop, in line for a gyro, picking out a pashmina for his wife, and playing grab alpha sigma sigma with some guy outside of a club. We've seen him a bunch of times and all we can say is that he is a busy man.
Last night we slept for 12 hours and I must say there's a whole lot more where that came from. We made it to the southeastern part of the island to the black sand beaches of Perivolos. Our collective feet may lost a layer or two of skin, but otherwise it was excellent. I played volleyball with a Jesus look-alike who flat out told me he wouldn't play with me if I was either Turkish, a Cypriot, or an Italian. I told him my people came over on the Mayflower, so it was all good after that.
Also, I'm thinking about moving here and just manufacturing sleeves, because I can't even tell you the last time I've see more sleeveless shirts. I know it's hot here fellas, but if there's a way to take the fabric from your fannypacks and sew them to your shoulders I'd highly recommend it.
So, tomorrow back to Athens, and the crazy fires, which I don't think CNN or the NYTimes has been covering at all. I think they've all been put out though. Athens one night, then flying to Israel and then several million hours of flying and then back to US and A. Niiiiice. Thank you posters, nice to see you all are keeping up.
Last night we slept for 12 hours and I must say there's a whole lot more where that came from. We made it to the southeastern part of the island to the black sand beaches of Perivolos. Our collective feet may lost a layer or two of skin, but otherwise it was excellent. I played volleyball with a Jesus look-alike who flat out told me he wouldn't play with me if I was either Turkish, a Cypriot, or an Italian. I told him my people came over on the Mayflower, so it was all good after that.
Also, I'm thinking about moving here and just manufacturing sleeves, because I can't even tell you the last time I've see more sleeveless shirts. I know it's hot here fellas, but if there's a way to take the fabric from your fannypacks and sew them to your shoulders I'd highly recommend it.
So, tomorrow back to Athens, and the crazy fires, which I don't think CNN or the NYTimes has been covering at all. I think they've all been put out though. Athens one night, then flying to Israel and then several million hours of flying and then back to US and A. Niiiiice. Thank you posters, nice to see you all are keeping up.
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