One Eighth the Wiser

I'm one eighth the way into my MBA. And knowing how much work it takes to not want to crawl into a hole come exam time, I'm really trying to get ahead and stay ahead. I have a fresh set of professors, a fresh set of classes, and fresh set of issues to be named later. I'm taking World Economy, Operations, Marketing, and Finance and the best part is that on Mondays and Wednesdays I'm done at noon which means I have time for the gym. I felt rejuvenated just walking to the gym on Monday. I felt like my arms were going to fall off on Tuesday though but it was worth it.

My Finance professor is awesome. He waxes poetic about love and finance and how the two are related. He insists that instead of writing out decimal points such as 43.88 you just write 43.love. What are decimals anyway in the scheme of life, he says, life is about love. This guy loves Finance and he loves to teach and it's kind of inspiring. In fact, if you aren't inspired by this guy I'd say you probably have a lump of coal for a heart. All around business school you see people pouring themselves into the things they love, whether it be Accounting, environmental issues, strategy competitions, saving the whales, or even getting drunk at Thursday happy hours. I've never ever met a bunch of people so damn passionate about what they do. Sometimes it scary.

...And then the Recruiting Machine rolls through. It's a big machine, with lots of fancy guns that spit out fancy appetizers and tote bags. The Recruiting Machine lures people with the promise of huge salaries, signing bonus, and shiny blackberries, and best of all the Recruiting Machine comes to you. Right to your door in Ann Arbor.

"Sorry Optimus, but unless that gun is shooting out mini crabcakes you are yesterday's news"



And don't get me wrong, the Recruiting Machine is a beautiful thing. It offers opportunities that you really could not get (or would have a very hard time getting) anywhere else in the world. The Recruiting Machine says "Hey man, you want to work in Hong Kong for the summer, I can make it happen. You want to do a product launch for Apple, come talk to me." And not only that, the Recruiting Machine is going to take you out for dinners and tell you about these awesome opportunities. You're going to trade in that Top Ramen for some tuna tartar over soba noodles. But here's the rub. While we are stuffing our faces, telling "our story", and walking around in our suits 3 days a week we start to forget about what we really love.

Okay, I'm not sure where this post is going but I'm going to propose what I call the "Good Life Test". Kanye West has a song out called "Good Life" and every time I hear it I think of doing the things in my life that I love the most. Now I admit, I can't make a career of standing on the beach in Amagansett and throwing fly patterns into the ocean (or can I?), but this song makes me think of my perfect future job, which I'm hoping allows me to be happy and thus live a...everyone together now..."good life". I'm going to recommend you check out the video. Just listen to the song first sans video and then watch the whole thing together. Hopefully you'll have the same mini-epiphany that I had after hearing it. If you hear this and you think you should be, I don't know, a magician, then I say abracadabra. If you hear this and it makes you want to be a trader then I hope you get up every morning and pour yourself a big bowl of Wall Street Journal and go kill it on trading floor.

Here's the link to the song and video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmX9ci9Fczw

(I'd embed this video if I could. Sorry)

I guess the half-assed moral of the story here is that don't let the machine dictate who you are and what you can do. Pursue your own "good life" whatever that may be. Clearly on Thursday night my brain is fried from the week of class. So if you've stayed with me this far, thank you. I've struggled to write this so I can only imagine reading it. Hopefully I'll be back later this weekend with something more coherent.

Attack of the Bobbleheads

If I hear the phrase "deep dive analysis" one more time I'm going to take a long walk off a short pier. "Forty thousand foot view" is also another one of these overused business phrases. My question is that if people are so busy taking "deep dive looks" and "forty thousand foot views" is anybody actually addressing these issues from a normal point of view? I've invented a new business phrase and it's called "terra firma". People who first want to look at an issue without donning a wetsuit and deep diving or without sporting an oxygen tank and climbing to 40 thousand feet can just roll with me and wear normal business clothes "terra firma" style.

After three days of presentations there must be people with significant neck cramps from nodding so much. During these breakout sessions it's typical to find an associate, VP, or MD from one of the business units surrounded by eager MBAs, or gunners as they're called, trying to ask some questions and make an impression. I'm not going to lie, I'm up in the mix, but unlike some of my classmates I'm not trying to find out what kind of toothpaste these guys use. Fellas, it's called personal space. I try to give these guys some room, ask my question, get my answer and then leave. But you'll see seven students surrounding one employee just listening and nodding their heads for hours on end. If you step back and look around it's really funny. This is the best way I can describe a typical MBA-VP discussion.





"Yes, hello, my name is Jim Wannabebanker, and I have a three part question. First, what do you think of the recent credit crunch and will it affect hiring for this coming year. And if it does do you think it will be as a result of an internal restructuring, and what would that restructuring entail. Actually I guess that's four parts."







"Well, as you know we took some writeoffs this past quarter, but what we're really going to focus on is how many gold buttons are on my suit. I count three. I wouldn't worry about restructuring because it isn't going to affect how many shirts you'll have to pick up from the drycleaners for me. Basically I can say anything right now, and you are going to nod your head like an idiot. Is you mother a smelly pirate hooker?"










(Nodding)











Excellent. I'm going to work your sorry ass so hard this summer that you might as well not even rent an apartment because you'll be living at your desk. Isn't that great?










(Nodding)










Wonderful. I'm looking forward to our interview when I ask you to open a window that unbeknownst to you is permanently locked, just so see how much effort you are willing to put into it. Wait, hold on a second...my boss is calling...











"God dammit Jones. Did I not say two-ply? Are you a moron? Are you deaf?"










(nodding)








Forget those Vault Guides, that's how it goes. I'm back on the plane tomorrow to Ann Arbor. This stay has been way too short, but it is what it is. Hopefully I'll get some interviewing love which will bring me back a couple more times between now and the summer. Until then I'll be practicing eating danishes.

New York, New York...So nice they named it twice

It's good to be back in New York and its good to be done with my exams. A family friend recently went through Navy Seals Training and he said part of his training was wading out 20 yards into the rough ocean, sitting down, and getting rocked by the crashing waves for thirty minutes straight. That's what comes to mind when I think about how exams went. I learned a lot during the course of the last six weeks and most importantly I learned I'm not going to be an economist, a statistician, or an accountant. Professional omelet-maker, and dirty laundry accumulator are looking like the most viable career options at this point, which is good because the sky is the limit for those two professions. And speaking of professions, part of the reason I am here this week is to meet with companies and learn about summer internship opportunities in the areas of Finance, and Media/Entertainment. I don't really get fired up about these presentations because most of time at the on-campus presentations I ended up with bruised ribs from people jockeying for position in order to ask stupid questions to recruiters. And then on top of that some of the people from the companies who come to present really need to be knocked off the imaginary pedestals they think they're standing on.

For the purpose of anecdotes I'm not naming company names, because its hard enough getting a job as it is. While I know my blog readership is now at a robust seven people, I'm expecting a call from Gawker any day now and I don't want to shoot myself in the foot just in case these stories end up being read by millions upon millions of adoring fans. So yesterday we get into our first presentation and on of the senior level employees walks in and the first thing he says is "Whoever eats the most danishes will definitely get an internship". We all laughed politely as we are expected to do. But then he said "seriously, if you eat the most danishes you'll get a job". REDACTED. REDACTED. Thirdly, there are international students who don't understand fraternity humor, and it was sad to see them fill their plates with danishes.

And speaking of food, I had a great dinner on Friday night at Schiller's Liquor Bar, on Saturday I hit up my used-to-be-favorite Thai spot for some pad see ew, and then Sunday at the Giants game I enjoyed a two-meal tailgate of eggs, bacon, dogs, and chicken and couple porch sodas (thanks to Jason and hotshot lawyer Esh). Just to clarify on the thai place, they started skimping on portion size, which is not a good idea. I would suggest that Luscious Thai not piss me off because never ever have I seen another person in the restaurant when I was there. Not a one. And I doubt they want to lose their only customer. Up at school, when I eat in the cafeteria and I want more food I flash the dimples and say, "May I have some more? I'm a growing boy", which translates to eat least one more spoonful of mashed potatoes if a woman is serving, and about a half a spoonful more if a guy is serving. In NYC they just don't show the same love. But I'll bounce back because nobody can stock a fridge like my grandmother, so I'm set for the rest of the week and in-case the power went out in NYC I'd be set for the rest of the month. Hopefully by the end of the week I'll look more like me and less like Powder.


"Finger, I'm so pale because I stay inside all day reading your blog"


I'm sure I'll have a lot more to say about the week once I'm done with all the hustling around Manhattan. Until then...

Hold the Phone...

Finals are taking place this week and FingertheBlog is grinding...grinding really hard. He's tired and grumpy and he misses having the time to drop beats, rhymes, and life on this blog, but he'll be back next week...LIVE FROM NYC...

Enjoy the weekend.

Savvy Marketing

With finals approaching I'm not sure how much blogging I'll be doing in the next week as my time is taken up by studying, group meetings, discussing the group meetings, and then discussing the discussion we had about the group meeting. Luckily every group I'm in this semester is a pretty solid amalgamation of diverse interests and work experiences. And it also doesn't hurt to have a former economist in my econ group. Anyway, I'm not sure how all the studying gets done, but I tend to think about these things in terms of time, as in, come 5pm on next Thursday I'm done and until then I'm going to hustle and scrap my way to the finish line.

In this blog I want to talk about Radiohead and their new album, "In Rainbows" which came out the other day. Trying to keep up with iTunes, illegal downloads, the decline of actual CDs purchased and a myriad of other issue plaguing the music industry, Radiohead made their entire album a free download. There is no suggested cost, and basically you pay what you wish, kind of like the whole NYC museum scene on Friday after work. Some people will pay cost, some will pay more and some less. I will disclose that I paid nothing, but then donated a comparable sum to a charitable effort going on at school this week. I love the earth like that. If Radiohead is going to say, "Oy, take this music for free", then I'm going to say "You blokes are all right" and I'm going to download it for free. Time will tell whether Radiohead earns as much profit as some of their other releases, but you have to give them credit for doing what they're doing. It's also easier for them to do this as they've had several multi-platinum albums. If you want to get into the act check out www.inrainbows.com.

Anyway, as for the album itself, it is in the vein of Kid A and Amnesiac, but a toned down version. I think I've listened to it three times through in the last 24 hours. The highs aren't as high and the lows aren't as low, which render the album less dramatic as their previous releases. Regardless, I think the songs are pretty solid. There's a lot of music out there that you hear and you say "I could do that", but Radiohead does not and has never even come close to falling into that category. Their sound doesn't get stale and I don't even know where they come up with the ideas for these instrumentals. The one knock is that I think Thom Yorke does a little bit to much "whining" on this album. I'm not going to get all Rolling Stone on you with a full out musical review, but I will say that it is worth the 3 minutes to go and download the album. Things are much sweeter when they are free, or heavily discounted. I actually have that phrase tattooed across my back, which is a pretty dumb tattoo, but not as dumb as this one...


In case you can't see that well, it's Tennessee Titans QB Vince Young, who apparently forgets what his name is from time to time, a real hazard of being an NFL QB these days. Vince, seriously, that tattoo is weak sauce, buddy. My mom has sewn about 100 little "J. Finger" labels into socks, towels, underwear, and God knows what else over the past 26 years, and I'm thinking that a little "V. Young" label is probably a little less painful and equally effective, no?

Thursday night tonight, which means, big night of studying and writing, OH YEAH! I actually just watched Blood Diamond, although I had to spread it out over the course of 4 days since I don't have the time to sit down and get it done in one sitting. Fellas, let me say this, if your soon to be fiance is bugging you about the size of the ring she wants, just sit her down, pop in Blood Diamond, let Leo make her cry, let Djimon Hounsu make her feel guilty, and then take her to Tiffany the next day. You'll be guaranteed to save some serious coin, which you can then use to upgrade to that 50 inch plasma TV, which you can use to watch Blood Diamond again and again in hi-def surround sound any time your lady becomes a Nagging Nancy. It's like, "hey honey, can we just finish this argument after the movie? I'm up to the part where he sees his family and realizes his only son was taken by the rebels, and he can't even go into the refugee camp to hug his wife and daughter. But we can talk about the important stuff like why I didn't text you back last night when the movie is over, okay?"

And you're thinking....
"Blood Diamond. Best. Movie. Ever. Maybe she'll bake me some cookies. Jennifer Connelly is the hottest reporter I've ever seen."

And she's thinking..."I'm complaining about texting when people are dying in Sierra Leone, God, I'm such a baby. He sure likes that movie, maybe he has a crush on Jennifer Connelly. Maybe I should make him those cookies he loves. "

In summation...

Radiohead...Strong to medium strong
Blood DiamondS...bad bad bad, extremely bad
Blood Diamond, the movie...good good good, extremely good
Jennifer Connelly...The cat's meow, but I wouldn't watch "House of Sand and Fog" again if you paid me.

Jay Z and J-Date

I love Ann Arbor, especially Thursday through Saturday when I sleep and feel like a human again. When I can finally breathe I also have time to reflect and I'm going to share a small gripe (again). Let me break this down using a popular Jay Z lyric...

"I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one"

Where to start.

First, literally. I think in front of me sits 3 practice tests, 2 from Statistics, and 1 from Accounting, and just for the sake of making this work let's just say that each test has 33 problems. So literally I have 99 problems right now. But let me say this, I would rather have 100 problems if it meant that I had a "bitch" as that 100th problem.

I'm not sure if this is any barometer of the female situation in Ann Arbor, but last week an email was sent to our MBA section (we are 1 of 6 sections with about 80 people in each section) telling us about a mixer with the Pharmacy School. And after the email went out there was a legitimate buzz among the guys in my section. The Pharmacy School. Not the Nursing School. Not the Education School. The Pharmacy School. Granted, the Pharmacy School is about 90% ladies, but still. I think by the end of the day there was such a buzz about the Pharmacy School that I heard they are favored to beat Michigan this weekend by 10 points. Mind you, this is before anyone has even seen a single girl from the Pharmacy School. It's a good time to be a woman in Pharmacy School. There is high demand for pharmacists in general, and an all-time high demand among MBA1s who want to talk to a girl about something besides the Econ test. So let's think of some good things about dating a pharmacist. Here's a quick brainstorm...

1. Honest
2. Want to help people
3. Look good in white
4. No "your prescription will be ready in an hour" nonsense
5. Good working hours

So maybe you've been dating a pharmacist for a few weeks, and then you call in a prescription to your local drug store, and you go in to pick it up and then this happens...







"Brenda, hey, what are you doing here?"

"Hey Tim, what a surprise. Well I am a pharmacist you know, so I work at a pharmacy. Are you picking up something?"







"Yes. No. kind of. I mean, I was actually just looking for some...chewing gum, and look, here it is. Ah yes, chewing gum, my favorite"

"Well it looks like you just had a prescription refilled. Here are your medicated supp...suppositories? What the hell?"










"Brenda, wait, I can explain. See, I have this friend, and his name is also Tim Atkins, and he lives with me too, so you see...

"Likely story Tim. You know what, I can't make it to dinner on Friday. Something just came up. I have to stay here and count inventory."








"Just great, Brenda. Just great. Now I'll never go out on a date again."












"Heyyyyyy Timmy, call me. I'll come over and rock your world"







By the way, Jamie Foxx used to be really really funny. If you don't believe me go back and watch a lot of In Living Color. The above might have been a little exaggerated and would probably be the worst case scenario. I'm not that worried about it all though. If I have no luck after the Pharmacy, Law, Nursing, Medical, Veterinary, Natural Sciences, Dental, and Public Policy mixers then maybe there's cause for concern. One caring reader sent me a note with a suggestion. The below is from Charmaine, from Charlotte, NC.



First of all, thank you for your concern Charmaine. Second of all, them girls are not lonely, they're probably just not finding what they want out there and I can understand that. I have previously said that I'd move to Alaska before I went on JDate, and I'm sticking to that. Although I do hear it's nice there in the summertime, and I do need a summer internship....

I know people who have met on JDate and I even know a couple that is getting married that met on JDate. It's a good thing that JDate exists, and I firmly believe that. That being said, I'd like to meet my next lady friend perhaps in the library or at a small gathering or maybe over an egg cream soda at the local ice cream parlor, and not sitting on my computer alone in the dark at 3am.

So in summation, yeah, whatever. 'Tis what it is, and it's Thursday, which for me means it's Friday since I don't have class until Monday. Enjoy the weekend and keep an eye out for me.