80/20 Rule

This is an in-transit blog. Part was written in Detroit, part in Miami, and when I finally post this thing it will be from St. Croix. In a number of my classes my professors have invoked this alleged 80/20 rule. I’ve heard this applied to so many different parts of the business world that I really can’t even be sure what the origin of this thing is, although I think that it’s something like 20% of an assembly line causes 80% of the problems. Don’t quote me on that. In my opinion that 80% of the time my professors have mentioned this they’ve been 20% full of shit. The good thing about the 80/20 rule is that you can apply it to all sorts of things not even remotely related to the business world.

This is the fourth year I’ve done this St. Croix trip and at this point I can say 80% of the clothing I bring I wear 20% of the time. Knowing this, I’ve finally managed to pack appropriately. Borat bathing suit …check…toothbrush…check…flip flops…check…and that’s about it this year. I have this thing down to a science.

I was very surprised to see how long the security line was this morning. There really is no reason the line should’ve been that long at 6:00am, and I’m pretty sure 80% of the hold-up is caused 20% of the people. At this point everyone should have a system when they get to the airport or get to security. I know which belts won’t set off the metal detector, I know to loosen my shoes as I begin moving up in line, I know to put my cell phone in the small pocket of my bag, and I know to put my boarding pass in my left back pocket. I mean, it’s not really rocket science. I saw some guy this morning just try to walk through with his shoes on after watching the twenty people in front of him take off their shoes. I wish I had an explanation. Wait, I do. It’s that 20% of the people traveling out of Detroit this morning were 80% overweight and my guess is that this guy simply didn’t even realize he had feet because he hadn’t seen them in 15 years. There was also an 80% chance that when he reached for his boarding pass in his back pocket that he’d only get his arm around 20% of his body. These things hold up line, and I’m sorry if I sound insensitive, but I’m just reporting on what I see.

When I finally got to the terminal I put my stuff down and closed my eyes. Some guy sits down next to me and starts chatting. I’ll talk with anyone, but I really wasn’t in the mood. This guy sees the butt of a racquet sticking out of my backpack and starts asking me if it’s a squash racquet, to which I tell him, no it’s a tennis racquet. And then he asks if I’m allowed to bring tennis racquets on the plane. I told him I had special government permission and that ended that. Anyway, I realized that 80% of the people who try to talk to you while you are waiting at your gate are 20% crazy. Back in the Fall I sat next to a strange dude who basically told me he was creating this soft-core porn website. Having told him that I used to be in marketing we were chatting about marketing strategies and media buying and this and that. Then the guy whips out his computer and logs onto his site and starts showing me the “content”, if you will. I mean, I’d been talking to this guy for an hour, and at this point I felt like it would’ve been rude not to look at the site, but it was kind of awkward looking at soft-core porn at 7am in Detroit Metro Airport with this total stranger. Again, 80/20.

Anyway, I’m finally in St. Croix and I’m 80% sure than by tomorrow evening I will be 20% darker. While I still don’t fully understand the 80/20 rule, I urge you all to apply it to your lives because, well, because you can.